Mr. Lost and my book

The last couple days I had been worried about Mr. Lost... He hasn't been communicating over the pearl. When I asked him what was going on he mentioned something about another experiment, that he was fully a hume now and he has a mechanical spider "omega" .... He said that he was wanting to be a dragoon before he came back.. I am not sure what happened.

Anyways.... I am not sure how to exactly word what has happened... It was quite a surprise.

I finished with the consul, who was angry and yelling.. *another story* heading back to my house to get my equipment to go out and train when I heard Mr. Lost's voice in my head.. It was odd.. I was thinking of him when it happened. He was seeing how I was doing if I was any better than the other day. I let him know that I was doing pretty good and it was odd to hear his voice since I was just thinking about him. I was out slaying more orcs when he said that he had something to tell me.

He was concerned that I would laugh at him. I told him I would not, but didn't press him to tell me what he wanted to. I guess he decided it was ok to tell me... He wanted to let me know that he had feelings for me. This was quite a shock and I wasn't sure what to say for a while. There is something about him.. I don't know what, but something there that draws me to him.. Even when he was a Yagado, I am still not sure why I wasn't freaked out by it when he first told us.

I am not sure if he feels this way because of how I have treated him... I haven't felt sorry for him but maybe compasion.. Anger.. frustration.. He has been directly influenced by my people experimented on for who knows what reason. Would he have had a normal child hood? did he have parents? I feel that he could lead me to some answers about my own questions.. my parents, where are they? What happened to them? What involvement to this secret organization do they have?

I am still not sure why.. but I told him about my parents about my book. How the pages look different depending on who is looking at it. That when I look at it, the letters... are of some unknown language. The blank pages that always seem to be there. I let him know about some other things that I dare not even write... If they were to be discovered it would severely hinder what little progress I have made. I believe that for now we have an understanding, and some of the same goals. I do hope my trust was not missplaced..

As far as training goes. I was able to increase my skills as a white mage. This is partially thanks to Soli for coming to protect me in the dunes. It was very nice of him to come and do that. I hate to have him waste his time doing things like this since I should be able to fend for myself and have the group I am with protect me, but yet again we had a few people that I question their existence and what the Gods have planned for them because they were quite worthless in what they did. I better get back and check with the consul I am sure there is some other odd job for me to do. Apparently till I finish this mission they have given me they think they can just order me to do whatever waste of time job they want.